uuu how do you feel about semester one?

Hello, Assalamualaikum.

Ya girl finished 1/4 of the IB programme already wohoooo!

The past 6 months taught me so many things, it definitely shaped my worldview, the way I think, my personality changed A LOT. I met wonderful people, some of them are my classmates, my neighbour in hostel or merely someone I passed through in hallway that helped me go through my semester. Anyway, what is life without some concern and here are some of my issues of this semester. No worries it all ended with a happy ending.

 

Am I dumb? (No, you are not, but you dumb for thinking that you are)

Typical scene of when you first started college. Every first meeting, be it your classroom, club meeting etc It had always started with introduction from everyone, kan? It is simple, telling people your full name, nickname, former school and sometimes they act cool and also asked for interesting fact of yourself (istg the hardest question ever).

This woman (read: me), suddenly developed a fear, more like an inferiority complex because they are too many of these college students that came from M*RSM and SB* that I started to feel underserved of the opportunity to attend KMB. Lol, ok la as I am writing this, I feel like my worries was so unnecessary but no shit sherlock, that feeling, insecurities made me feel so bad about myself.

I had even introduced myself like this:

"Hello, my name is Amirah, but you can call me Milo. Hmm, I don’t want to introduce my school, it is not famous I am sure none of you know it anyway,"

See. I even treat myself that low. Labels like;

 "Oh, that guy from S*S, sekolah budak pandai kut"

or

"Ah, she is from S*P, top school in Malaysia,”

 I recalled spending the first month in college, being gloomed up because I feel as if I don’t deserve to be here although I received excellent result for my SPM just like these kids pun. I had even gone through interview to win myself a scholarship, if the government officers put so much trust in me to award me with a scholarship because they seen my potential, why can't I trust myself that I deserve all this opportunity?

I always tell myself “Rilek la Amirah, no big deal. You do you!”

Hehe.

Ha, so from that I tried to gain my confidence back that we students should not be put labelled by which school we graduated from. Instead, we are our own persona, and we don't adhere to the stereotypes of our former institution. Good news, I am no longer tied to those labels anymore I don’t feel threaten by other students, we are all here to study and as much as I do love me some academic competition, I shouldn’t belittle myself by thinking that I don’t belong where I am now. I am right where I am destined to be (LOL THIS IS SO CRINGY BUT TRUE OKAYY).

 MEN are so scary

When you spent 5 years in all-girl school you developed this how do I say this, you are uncomfortable around them because obviously you are not used with them being around kan. Luckily there is only 5 guys in my class, I could not imagine if I were placed in engineering class because it’s the complete opposite of my class. They got around 12 ish guys with only 5 or less girls hahaha takut.

Pastu cam aku siap, taknak gi dewan selera makan atau riadah dekat padang because they are too many guys. Bukan malu, ok la part of me malu with them but large part of it was just tak selesa. Macam back in my all-girl school, I am free to gedik-gedik around, duduk tak sopan dalam kelas, no need to pakai stokin, stongan to cover my aurat. Kalau tengah buat add math pun mesti stress kan so banyak la anak rambut terkeluar (stress bebenor), tapi tak kisah sangat la we are girls apa biasalah tu. Sekarang macam I became more conscious that ever sebab kene jaga aurat all the time, guys everywhere. Tapi, adaptation baby, lama-lama tu dah biasa dah. So, settled on that lol.

Oh yea, another issue the first month, I macam sumpah tak tahu how to interact with guys. It feels like super awkward with every guy I talked to. Again, pastu dah lama-lama tu okay dah. I think I adapt well la with KMB’s environment. I mean the guys there are not that scary la, so far, all the guys I know are nice people. HAHAAHHAHA.

Is IB difficult?

Hmm, at first, I was super scared of IB. People on internet keep on telling us that IB is like difficult and all, maybe because I am still in semester 1 so I have not gotten the heat just yet. In terms of study method, I pretty much adapted the same techniques I used during SPM. For humanities, I made notes, cheat notes (which I only put main point for each sub-topic, something you quickly skimmed over before your test). Nothing special as such.

My favorite subject throughout the semester is Theory of Knowledge (TOK) or what lay people referred to as Epistemology. I feel really welcomed in that class, I was able to voice out my opinion with other people and overall, I enjoyed that class the most. You see, I did not have this kind of opportunity before in my high school and suddenly gotten a grasp on this ofc I would be super excited kan hehe.

 Oh, yea my result for Semester 1 is as below;

ENG HL- 7

Business HL- 6

Economy HL- 7

ESS (Ecology) SL- 7

MAA (Math) SL- 5

Malay SL- 7

PAI- 7

TOK- B

 

Markah keseluruhan I got 39/42. Could have done better but I am proud of my result hehe.

 

Till then, BYE!